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Living and Working Mindfully…The Case for Compassion

In a recent Harvard Business Review article on stress, the authors mentioned 2 key strategies that help leaders effectively manage stress: tipping point awareness-recognizing when you are exhibiting behaviors indicating you are nearing your threshold of overwhelm, and stress shifting through intentional breathing. More and more we hear evidence of how intentionally pausing to breathe, can be a powerful anecdote to stress. What’s more, mindful breathing can help restrain us when we are about to interrupt someone or blast a colleague or employee with negative criticism.

As a teacher of Mindfulness Meditation, I recommend this to all my executive coaching and personal counseling clients because stress is everywhere, and the breath is always with us to slow the runaway nervous system and our quick tongue.

“She did me wrong”, “He attacked me in that meeting”! When clients feel wronged, whether at home or at work, I listen with compassion and invite them to be compassionate with themselves. After the grief and hurt is calmed, I invite the person to release the hurt, because resentment only hurts the one holding on to the anger. Thus, forgiveness and letting go clears the way for effective problem solving so one can plan the best approach to an honest conversation with the other party. Let’s face it, we humans aren’t always at our best and our communication often goes awry. Misunderstandings, the silent treatment or thinly veiled alliances that pit one group again the other ensue. Resentment, hurts and grudges impede team work and sabotage success. As Judith Glaser in her book: Conversational Intelligence (2014, Bibliomotion, Inc.) says, people get stuck in positional conversations or the Tell Sell Yell syndrome, and innovative solutions cannot occur. So, yes, at work, too, in the most sophisticated organizations I recommend Mindfulness, compassion, forgiveness and letting go. After all, its only then, with a clearer mind that can we think clearly, created trusting connections get back to business.

Blind Spots and Building Blocks to Listening

Often, we hear and don’t listen. Or, we listen and think we know what the other person thinks but we don’t. In fact, according to Sandford research study 9 out of 10 conversations miss the mark. http://plato.stanford.edu/entries/speech-acts/. Why is this? One of the reasons is because we use words and phrases that the other person understands and uses in a very different way or degree. Take Harry, a friend a of mine who was unemployed although he was looking diligently for over 3 months. I asked this soft-spoken man how he felt about the job search process and he said he was “depressed.” (I had used the word “depressed” for minor setbacks like when I gained a few pounds!) So, I did what Judith Glaser calls “double clicking” I asked him to share with me what “depressed” felt like for him. He said he felt “like he was climbing a mountain with a piano on his back!” This brought tears to my eyes because I now understood what he was really trying to say.

In personal or business conversation we may think we know what someone means when we may not. Using “double clicking” or reflective listening gives the listener a chance to state what we heard and then, invites the speaker to say more so we really hear the accurate; deeper meanings of their comment. I have found that when people take the time to do this, understanding really opens people feel heard and co -created solutions can be generated.

Upcoming Events

Sept 27, 2018 6 pm Corner Bakery, King of Prussia
Marjorie  presents “ Insights on Type and Mindfulness” at the  Philadelphia Area MBTI meetup for trainers, coaches and practitioners

Oct 24, 2018 Mindfulness Based Support Group
6-7:15 for 6 Wednesdays
Personal Touch Physical Therapy
790 E. Market St, Suite 290
West Chester, PA 19382

Oct 30, 2018 11-12:30
Leadership: The Importance of Presence
Novak Francella LLC, a Bala Cynwyd CPA Firm

Oct 30, 2018 11-12:30

Leadership: The Importance of Presence

Novak Francella LLC , a Bala Cynwyd CPA Firm

June/July 2018 PowerPoints

The newest addition of PowerPoints is out!  Take some time for you to read my latest blog excerpt, upcoming events and more about my practice. Take the time to pause and refresh this summer! As the Dalai Lama once said: “Calm mind brings inner strength and self-confidence, so that’s very important for good health.”

Enjoy your summer and be on the lookout for an announcement for the next Mindfulness Groups in the September PowerPoints issue!

 

June/July 2018 PowerPoints

 

Mindfulness Meditation Group Starts April 11, 2018

Starting Wednesday April 11, 2018

mindfulness

Mindfulness Meditation Group


6 Weeks ($200) includes CD “Come to the Quiet”

Register & pay by April 4 to get a $20 discount!


Location: 937 Prichard Avenue, West Chester, PA 19382
Time: 7:30 – 8:45 PM
To register email Marjorie@ascendconsulting.net or call (610) 696-4443

Unsure what “Mindfulness” is:  read my blog “Mindfulness is the Secret to Success!” for more information and see what all the hype is about! 

March/April 2018 PowerPoints

The newest addition of PowerPoints is out!  Take some time for you to read my latest blog excerpt, upcoming events and more about my practice. Make Spring 2018 the start of a new beginning for you and  your life. A fitting quote from Buddha, “What we think, we become.”

Have a great spring and I hope to see you at my upcoming Mindfulness Meditation Group starting April 11th.

March/April 2018 PowerPoints

PowerPoints strategies for growth.

You have reached your growth potential.

Reminder! Mindfulness Meditation Group Starts Jan 23, 2018

Starting January 23, 2018
6 Weeks ($180) includes CD “Come to the Quiet”
Location: 937 Prichard Avenue, West Chester, PA 19382
Time: 7:30 – 8:45 PM
To register email Marjorie@ascendconsulting.net or call (610) 696-4443

Unsure what “Mindfulness” is:  read my blog “Mindfulness is the Secret to Success!” for more information and see what all the hype is about! 

Mindfulness Meditation Group Starts 1/23/18

Starting January 23, 2018
6 Weeks ($180) includes CD “Come to the Quiet”
Location: 937 Prichard Avenue, West Chester, PA 19382
Time: 7:00 – 8:15 PM
To register email Marjorie@ascendconsulting.net or call (610) 696-4443

Unsure what “Mindfulness” is:  read my blog “Mindfulness is the Secret to Success!” for more information and see what all the hype is about! 

Mindfulness Meditation and Type: Discussion and Practice For DVAPT 11/11/17

Welcome to this relaxed and interactive program on Mindfulness Meditation and its usefulness in working with Type. You will learn the background, science, and principles that are foundational to Mindfulness Meditation. Information will be interspersed with practice exercises to help integrate the learning. We will discuss together how Mindfulness may be applied in our work with Type in counseling, coaching or team facilitation. 

Date: November 11, 2017

Time: 9 AM – 12:30 PM

Location: Mainline Counseling and Wellness Office
600 Haverford Road, Suite # 201, Haverford, PA 19041

Free parking and accessible by SEPTA.

Please RSVP to: Johanna Levitt – jlcounselingtime@aol.com 

Women Business Connection-Chesco Event. 8/8/17

Follow the link for more information and registration for this great upcoming event! https://wbcchesco.com/events/#!event/2017/8/8/august-luncheon-workshop-dealing-with-difficult-people

April PowerPoints 2017

The April PowerPoints newsletter is out! Take a moment to read about my upcoming events and how I can help your business and life through my coaching. A brief excerpt from my newest blog “How do you Plan?” will hopefully entice you to read more at my website. Have a great spring and remember, “It is not where you start that matters, it’s where you are going, who you become, and the positive impact you have along the way.”

April PowerPoints

Daily routine

Change your life daily routine

March PowerPoints

The wait is over! March PowerPoints is here and chalk full of exciting information. March is Social Work Month. Read our March PowerPoints to learn a little more about this exciting and important field. Happy reading!

March Power Points